Part 3 (The One with the Grande Caffe)

This entry is part 3 of 5 in the series Not Your Mama's Spaghetti and Meatballs

Totally lying again. Grande caffè is Italian for “large coffee.” There is no grande caffè.

Was no grande caffè.

Will never be a grande caffè.

And this is the crux of the problem. Hence the title.

Plus I already used “The Hills are Alive” as a blog post title a while back, which would have been just as relevant to this discussion.

What was I talking about again?

Oh, yes. The coffee.

The ever-loving coffee.


grande caffe

There it is in all its minuscule glory. It was Paris all over again. Only it wasn’t.

We were in the foothills of the Alps, driving through some pretty awe-inspiring terrain, as well as encountering mountain roads straight out of my worst nightmare. I’m not afraid of heights. I’m not. Facing down a 160-foot drop, I did a bungee-swing once. At Six Flags. But I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t be bouncing back if this went terribly wrong.

Driving in Italy

Back to the coffee.

“Very large coffee, please. Please. Yes, I know I’m an annoying American with my coffee addiction, but I’m offering to pay you for two (yes DOUBLE!) of your largest coffees just to get the amount I need. Put it all together in the biggest cup you have, and we will shell out 12 euros. Please. Just please.”

No. Apparently the European coffee police have decided that any more coffee than this (see above picture) in one sitting is a crime against humanity. So we must stop at multiple locations along the way just to appease the coffee gods.

What can you do?

But this episode is brought to you by a scene straight out of The Sound of Music, Julie Andrews singing her heart out in the background.


Words couldn’t do it justice. But I’m trying. I really am.

A picture is worth a thousand words, but even a picture doesn’t put you there to feel the beauty of it. Air so clean you can taste heaven.


Series Navigation<< Part 2 (The One with George Clooney)Part 4 (The One with the Assassin and the Accordion) >>
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Lisa M. Green

Author & Copyeditor at Lisa M. Green
Lisa M. Green is the author of The First, a novel of mythic and paranormal fantasy. She is also a high school English and Special Education teacher. As a life-long writer, she considered a career in screenwriting or journalism before deciding on a career in education. As a teacher, she enjoys educating high school students about writing.
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